An action thriller starring Dwayne “the Rock” Johnson as the father of a son who’s wrongly accused of being a terrible no good druggie. The movie isn’t as bad as you might think, but it’s still not great. However, if you like this type of movie, you could do worse. Like, say, anything with Sylvester Stallone made after… what year was Rocky made in? Anyway, it’s a solid… meh. But, uh, good for The Rock? He’s a bankable movie star now, whouda thunk? Not even his mother. HIS OWN MOTHER.

Dark SkiesEverywhere
It’s another movie from one of the producers of the Paranormal Activity franchise — they’re just trying to get PAID while the money is good, and as long as we’re buying what they’re putting down, it’ll never stop. That said, it’s not like the success of Paranormal Activity: Dog House Haunting is any less depressing than pretty much any big Hollywood movie, so… basically, just cut out your eyes and saw off your ears because WE FUCKED.

Bless Me, UltimaEverywhere
Another young boy’s coming of age story — this time in rural 1940s New Mexico! You maybe had to read this book in high school, and hated it. However, if you enjoy being cultured at the cinema (liar), or looking smart to impress a friend who’s an even bigger asshole than you are — have at it!

The GatekeepersEmbarcadero
Fascinating documentary about the Shin Bet, Israel’s secret service. Those fools are legit NUTS and TERRIFYING. And also, very effective. In The Gatekeepers, we get an inside look at the intimate relationship the counterterrorism agency has in the Israeli-Palestinian conflict. It’s definitely the winner of the week, and so if you go to the movies, see this. Seriously, if you see anything else this week, you are the worst.

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