Battle Los Angeles – Everywhere
Sounds good to me! I mean, the idea. But the actual movie is hack science-fiction at its stupidest. This is the kind of movie that makes my mild-mannered lawyer father, a true blue sci-fi fan, start banging his head against a wall and threaten to end lives. Like, when he saw Aliens 3, he was so mad that he locked himself in his room for three days to rewrite the script. I worry that if he saw this, he might bomb entire sections of Hollywood and begin a real Battle Los Angeles. For real.
The Asian American Film Festival – Various
Go get classy and cultured by supporting this festival and its original art or be doomed to a lifetime of sloppy Judd Apatow remakes. I’m super interested in Open Season, the documentary about a Hmong American deer hunter who shot up a bunch of white hunters in Wisconsin. Hunting: psychos shooting innocent animals/occasionally each other AMERICA FUCK YEAH. The whole story is just so sad and fucked-up, from the racism to the murders, and I expect the documentary will be fascinating. Another eye-catcher is Clash, which is about a lady assassin martial arts master who assembles a crazy crew of thugs to Get Shit Done. Awesome.
Grrrls with Firepower – Castro – Friday only
Oh, it’s on TONIGHT! Triple feature (my favorite!) of The Craft, Thelma and Louise, and Ms. 45 for TWELVE BUCKS. That covers all three of my favorite genres of film: teen witch dramedies, pissed off beeyatches on the edge, and nuns with guns! Ladies, let’s do this.
Red Riding Hood – Everywhere.
TERRIBLE, and not in a fun way. If you want to see a good retelling of Little Red Riding Hood, just rent Freeway. Them’s some big ugly fuckin’ teeth you got, Bob! See Rain’s review here.
Happythankyoumoreplease – Embarcadero
It’s got Buster Bluth in it. That’s about all I can say that’s positive. It’s one of those terrible-ass twee ensemble movies where privileged white thirty-somethings try to figure their lives out. I’m sensing a theme, Hollywood! Every time you wake up during it, someone is crying. What depresses me the most about this movie is that I think it’s the kind of thing I would write. Shoot me.
I Saw The Devil – Lumiere Old Boy stars in this fucking terrifying, bad-ass Korean movie from hell. If you take someone to this movie, the adrenaline rush will ensure that you get laid. Or murdered. It’s a roll of the dice, my friends. Okay, I have to stop writing about this movie because I’m too scared.
Carbon Nation – Opera Plaza DOWNER. If you’re into feeling bad about how the planet is fucked, definitely check it out. Of course, you won’t change your life at all (inconvenient truth!) so really, why bother?
William S. Burroughs: A Man Within – Roxie
You probably love this old fool, so you might enjoy the archival footage of him talking shit and raising hell. Includes interviews with people like John Waters and Gus Van Sant, and the soundtrack is by Patti Smith and Sonic Youth. I don’t know, I feel like I should want to see this but I don’t really care. Maybe I’ll re-read Naked Lunch instead. Or maybe I’ll just watch Drop Dead Diva on Instant Netflix. I’ve said too much.
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