Previously: Monday, Monday, Can’t Trust That Day

I know “Glee” isn’t a new show, but it’s what starts my Tuesday nights, and as a result, every show I watch after it is terrific in comparison. Yes, I hate “Glee,” and yet continue to watch. I can’t explain it. Every time they butcher and auto-tune a song I love, I am just filled with rage, and as a result I have a tendency to fast-forward through the musical numbers which is, yes, kind of like skipping the sex in a porn movie in favor of the acting.

That said, Heather Morris as Brittany S. Pierce is awesome, and I want her to get her own spin-off.

“New Girl” follows “Glee” on Fox, and I have a similar reaction to it: The thing most people love about it is also my least favorite aspect, namely, Zooey Deschanel. Now, I don’t hate Zooey Deschanel. In fact, I find her very funny and charming at times. But a little of her tweeness goes a loooong way, and when the show piles it on, it just suffocates the comedy.

And her singing puts me into an instant coma. There’s something so monotone and insistently mellow about it, it reminds me of this “SCTV” sketch about Perry Como:

Seriously. Compare the above with the latest She & Him album, “Holiday Songs to Slit You Wrists To” “A She & Him Christmas.” The similarity is uncanny!

Thankfully, the show seems to recognize some of this Deschanel factor, and in the past few episodes her co-stars, in particular Jake Johnson and Max Greenfield, have proven themselves to be more than just straight men to her wackiness. From now on I’m just going to call the show “Douchbag Schmidt” instead of “New Girl.”

I gave CBS’s “Unforgettable” a one episode chance, and then, ironically, instantly forgot about it. But that one viewing convinced me I wouldn’t be able to get past Poppy Montgomery’s terrible American accent week after week.

Which leaves the CW’s “Ringer,” a show I continue to watch just because I am convinced at any moment the brilliance that was Sarah Michelle Gellar in “Buffy” is going to rip across the screen and wake the show up from its deadly dullness. I know it’ll happen! I can feel it! Any week now!

It’s probably not going to happen, is it?

Why, oh why does this show continue to be so boring? How much longer do we have to wait to find out what the hell Siobhan is up to? How stupid can all the people in her family continue to be?  I can get behind a slow-burn of a show, but the writing in this one is just not clever enough, and the actors not interesting enough to sustain that kind of storytelling. Vampires, or demons, or at least a third twin better show up soon, or I’m just going to have to slay “Ringer.”

Agree? Disagree? Let us know in the comments!

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the author

Rain Jokinen watches a lot of television and movies and then writes things about them on the Internet. She's a San Francisco native, and yeah, she'll rub that fact in your face any chance she gets.

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  • Eve Batey

    I understand, intellectually, that “New Girl” is a comedy, but I keep hoping it will veer off into Shallow Grave territory. Why would these men rent their room to this woman who is CLEARLY mentally ill, and who seems like a nightmare with whom to live? Did no one else respond to their ad?

    That said, I did laugh at the “cat raised by birds” thing last week (credit: Schmidt!), and I do kind of like that giant bathroom.

  • Eve Batey

    I understand, intellectually, that “New Girl” is a comedy, but I keep hoping it will veer off into Shallow Grave territory. Why would these men rent their room to this woman who is CLEARLY mentally ill, and who seems like a nightmare with whom to live? Did no one else respond to their ad?

    That said, I did laugh at the “cat raised by birds” thing last week (credit: Schmidt!), and I do kind of like that giant bathroom.