This week marks the official beginning of the fall TV season, with the networks desperately vying for your precious eyeballs. The question is, do they deserve those eyeballs? Let’s take a look at tonight’s offerings, and see…
“Mike & Molly,” 9:30 P.M.
What Is It?: A sitcom about two singles who meet cute at an Overeaters Anonymous meeting and fall in love.
Why To Watch: Melissa McCarthy (Molly) has been very, very funny on previous shows (“Gilmore Girls” and “Samantha Who?”), and it’s nice to see the fuller-figured featured on something other than a reality show.
Why To Turn the Channel: Fat jokes. There will be lots and lots of fat jokes.
“Hawaii Five-O,” 10 P.M.
Why To Watch: Hawaii is beautiful, the cast is beautiful, you miss “Lost,” and it’s fun to hear that theme song every week.
Why To Turn the Channel: It’s a remake of fricking “Hawaii Five-O” without Jack Lord, or the ’70s fashions. And it’s on CBS, a network that loves its conventions, and avoids risks. (See: “CSI: Anywhere,” “NCIS: Anywhere,” etc.)
“Lone Star,” 9 P.M.
What Is It?: A soapy drama about a con man living dual lives in Texas, trying to go legit while battling his con man father, and his father-in-law boss.
Why To Watch: The intriguingly crazy Jon Voight stars as the father-in-law and….I got nothing else.
Why To Turn the Channel: James Wolk, who plays Bob Allen, isn’t exactly dripping in charisma, and if the show doesn’t get good ratings, Fox will probably yank it in a month anyway.
“The Event,” 9 P.M.
What Is It?: An attempt by NBC to build a buzz-worthy successor to “Heroes” in the form of an action-filled drama centered on a guy’s search for his missing girlfriend.
Why To Watch: Because you want to find out what the hell “the event” is already, dammit.
Why To Turn the Channel: NBC has a history of screwing up shows like this (see the aforementioned “Heroes”), and if they tease out the reveal of “the event” for too long, it could prove tedious.
“Chase,” 10 P.M.
What Is It?: A procedural drama about U.S. marshals.
Why To Watch: Because you love shows about blonde, female, U.S. marshals, and “In Plain Sight” is on hiatus.
Why To Turn the Channel: The last thing TV needs is another procedural drama. Especially one about a blonde, female, U.S. marshal.