I was talking to some detectives in the park near my home today and they pointed out that if the police catch you with a pile of poo that you haven’t cleaned up, it’s actually cheaper to say that it’s your shit, rather than your dog’s.

Turns out, the fine for unpicked up dog poo is $319 and the police can add on another $319 fine if you are caught without a proper poo picking up tool. But if you, a human, shit on the ground the fine is only $79. You could risk an indecent exposure fine but I think they would have had to witness your “exposure.”

So next time you’re caught with poo, tell them it’s yours.

On her way to finding answers to your questions, Babe sees and hears a lot. Loiterer tells some of these stories, but she’s just one loiterer in a city of thousands — send your overheards and pocket-sized anecdotes her way.

the author

Babe Scanlon is a writer living and working in San Francisco. She's worked as an archaeologist, computer game designer, agent at Agent Provocateur and hypnotherapist. She is controlling your mind at this very moment.

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