ripitoff.jpgSometimes, you have to rip off your partner’s clothes. Maybe it’s because you saw it in a movie. Maybe you need some way to express your burning desire for his body. Either way, the clothes are going to come off and she probably didn’t want to wear those panties again anyway.

If you have a flair for the dramatic, you don’t have to go around in torn boxers and buttonless button-downs. Head to Goodwill for your wardrobe’s stunt doubles–that way you and and your wallet won’t cry when your partner renders your skirt useless. Go for buttons if you want a spectacle, but steer clear of zippers. Zippers and speed do no make good bedfellows, and nothing ruins an evening of fuck-me-up clothes like a tuft of chest hair (or worse) caught in metal or plastic teeth. You want something you can pull and rip and shred safely without hurting your partner and with a little bit of give to match your take.

For durability, snaps reign king. They’re not going to hold up forever with all your repeated tugging, but they’ll serve you better than buttons if you want to reuse your fuck-me-up clothes. Meet your friend: tearaway pants. If male strippers use them, so can you. Double plus if you actually end up using them onstage, but for now they’re a bedroom staple for wild nights with no time for frivolous undressing.

Save slow reveals for burlesque and mischievous moods. Fuck-me-up clothes feed unbridled lust, not a calculated tease. It’s about intensified passion and feeling raw and wild. That said, we still operate in reality, which means consent, communication, and perhaps a little planning. Show your partner your special outfit. “When you see me in this, I want you to rip all of it off, push me onto the bed, and fuck me silly.” You’ll get on with your day, go to work, come home, and BAM! You’ve had your Hulk Hogan moment.

Power is always in play in partner sex, even if it’s muted or balanced. When you rip off your partner’s clothes, you pronounce your physical power. In the heights of passion, power comes through as an arousing force as partners find pleasure in strength, spectacle, and destruction. Clothes, because they contour and cover the body, substitute for your partner’s body. Power over them is power over him, so ravage the clothes to rapture the body.

Image by The Doctr.

The Sexual Manifesto is Christine Borden’s weekly column on sex in the city, sex and culture, and, well, sex. Got a tip for Christine (and it’s not in your pants)? Email her at

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