I think it’s just marvelous that people running for elected office are using new media to announce their candidacy, because I much prefer the comfort of my own home and my own laptop to standing on the tracks while some old man shouts over patriotic bunting from the observation deck of a train.

Recently, the very attractive/boring Scott Wiener announced his candidacy for District 8 Supervisor on You Tube. During Scott’s 6 minute masterpiece, he stands in front of the “Ethics Commission” and tells us about himself. Maybe he should have stood in front of the “Film Commission” because his video sucks.

I wonder if it was planned that when Scott mentioned “The Castro” the elevator sassed, “Ding!”Let’s ignore the fact that Scott is standing in an administrative building hallway being filmed by what appears to be a hand held camera with appalling sound and the lighting of a Kohl’s dressing room. But why, dear God, is he standing next to a working elevator?

I feel for the poor soul who emerges of the 7th Floor only to find the “Scott Weiner 2011” team creating their cinematic masterpiece.

I do enjoy however, that the elevator bell keeps going off as he lists certain neighborhoods. I wonder if it was planned that when Scott mentioned “The Castro” the elevator sassed, “Ding!”

I’ve met Scott Wiener approximately 564 times and every time he stares over me, says “nice to meet you” and goes to talk to someone else. Yeah, he’s one of those. I’ve met him at Orson, I’ve met him at deathly DCCC events, I’ve met him at Pride(s). I’ve even greeted him at the front door of my beloved Brians’ Christmas Party, to which he offered a mere head nod.

“Did Scott Wiener just stroll past us?” I asked my dearest friend and co-greeter, Melissa. “How many times do I have to shake that man’s hand before I get a glimpse of recognition?”

The Brians, whose names Scott knows, assure me he’s really a good guy but it’s kinda tough to get behind a candidate that finds one so goddamn forgettable. Especially when his You Tube commercials look like an inter-building webisode about office kitchen etiquette.

Although what the hell do I know, other than who I’ve met before and who I haven’t. If I was producing Scott’s election video, I would’ve had him in a hot dog costume running around District 8’s Castro Street screaming, “Who wants Wiener!?!?!”


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