I know geese are gorgeous creatures who do nothing but look beautiful and fly into the engines of airplanes, but I have to admit, their force-fed livers are simply divine on toasted brioche. Supervisor and vest aficionado, Ross Mirkarimi proposed a city-wide ban on foie gras because apparently, we’re incapable of ordering for ourselves. I bet Ross’ lucky lady dreads going out on dinner dates with this admittedly hunky politician because he insists on deciding what she’ll have.

What if Ross thinks Bravo’s “Real Housewives” series is mean? Will that be banned too?

Much to the surprise of the Marina, the PlumpJack Group has responded to Mirkarimi’s proposal by pulling foie gras from all of their menus. Weird. Mayor Gavin Newsom owns PlumpJack. Or at least he used to. Or maybe kinda still does. Anyway, this obviously means that Ross has sucked Gavin into his bland, humane, boring world of tofu and pleather and to that, I say, Enough!

You’ve gone too far, Ross. This pate prohibition is one thing, but turning Gavin Christopher Newsom from an elitist, keg standing, fabulously philandering golden boy into an uptight, ethical, self-righteous Burning Man attendee is far worse than over-feeding some birds.

In other news, has anyone else joined me in breathless anticipation for gossip from Willie Brown’s international 75th birthday party? Anyone? Nobody? Bueller? As I’ve gloriously and nervously met Da Mayor about 75 times and he will never, until the day I die, remember me, I’m not shocked that I didn’t receive any invitations. A little disappointed, yes. But not shocked. A controversial figure, Mayor Brown delights me in a million ways, primarily sartorially. And I’m pretty sure that had any supervisor proposed a foie gras ban under his administration, Willie would have responded by enjoying a liver-packed lunch in the middle of City Hall, complete with a candelabra, wine pairings, uniformed wait staff and violinist.

I miss those days.

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