Wreck It Ralph – Everywhere
Animated comedy about a video game villan with a heart of gold. It’s light and fluffy cotton candy and sometimes you’re just in the mood to zone out and go along for the side, ya know? Election years are tough, mentally. Filled with cameos from all your favorite classic gaming bad guys, you can get high (on life or on drugs, whatevs!) and sit back and laugh and laugh.
The Bay – Kabuki
A Blair Witch-style horror film that confronts the fact that we’re killing the earth, every day and in every way. Seriously, everyone, wake-up! We’re living in a horror film and the killer is LOOK IN THE MIRROR. No, not behind you, there’s nobody there, I’m telling you to look AT YOURSELF. I could’ve done that in a more efficient way, I know, but the point is, humans are terrifying and poisoning the planet and I hate to say it but if the super-storm fits. I love a good political scary flick, I’ll be seeing this twice and then sending copies to the EPA as soon as it’s out on DVD and blu-ray.
Silent Hill: Revelation 3D – Everywhere
Shitty, boring horror flick with no plot and jump-scares that didn’t even make me jump. And I’m like, the jumpiest motherfucker on earth. SHAME ON YOU, SILENT HILL: REVELATION 3D.
The Man with the Iron Fists – Everywhere
A really really really great bad movie starring the RZA, Lucy Liu, and Russell Crowe. No, really, here’s the description, “Since his arrival in China’s Jungle Village, the town’s blacksmith (RZA) has been forced by radical tribal factions to create elaborate tools of destruction. When the clans’ brewing war boils over, the stranger channels an ancient energy to transform himself into a human weapon. As he fights alongside iconic heroes and against soulless villains, one man must harness this power to become savior of his adopted people.” SO. GOOD. This movie is one hundred percent for sure destined to be a classic cult-favorite so get in on it before you feel like the saddest loser in town who doesn’t know anything about pop culture. Which, in San Francisco, is a major badge of shame.