Some fantasies are too hot to keep off the page. Normally, we wait to release our burning desires–sexual and otherwise–but we don’t have to mire in the stagnancy of unrequited lust. Write down your desires and fantasies in a creative space, and you can realize them safely and without negative repercussions. You can even enhance the fantasy and its arousal factor as your imagination develops your fap-dreams.
In conventional fiction writing, the almighty They hammer into your head the concept of desire. Desire drives the plot and your character, making a situation into a story. Obstacles mount up against your characters, but their desires push them forward until their resolutions. The same goes for erotica.
Erotic fiction revolves around a sexual desire. She wants her, and she’ll do anything it takes to persuade her girl-friend to enter the bedroom. He wants her, but she’s timid and needs someone to tell her exactly what to do. She want him, but he’s a vampire. And in the end they all get their kicks after a requisite number of throbbing members and heaving bosoms.
Sounds hot? It’s even hotter if you’re typing it. That vague fantasy tumbling around in the cumulus of your brain becomes a saucy adventure in a slightly more realistic and yet still fantastical medium–and it’s all directed by you. Want to fuck your boss? Write it down (but not in the workplace!). Lust after that hipster barista despite his ironic tattoos and ugly piercings? You can drive yourself mad bottling up your lust-rage, so check your passion at the nearest Word document.
Of course, not everyone is textually inclined, but the process of writing forces you to flesh out fantasies. So you and the barista get together. What happens next? He pulls a shot as you’re on your knees, natch. You’d be surprised by how much your own imagination can turn you on and get you off. For those totally word-averse, other creative outlets, like painting or even dancing, can work just as well. Whatever the exercise, you want to force the fantasy out into a safe space where you can experiment with its logistics without actually carrying it out. Here, you can delete your missteps and the parts that don’t work or don’t rile your doodads. You can plot out maneuvers, try new tricks you’ve never dared try before. If you want to take it there, the thinking process could even lead you to fulfilling that very fantasy, now that you know how to carry it out and have the confidence to make it happen.
If you’re self-conscious about the ins and outs (teehee) of erotica, I’m sure you can find the right how-to guide to quell your fears. For the most part, though, the erotica is for your own enjoyment…unless you want to share with others. Don’t sweat the technique or ponder over the next best synonym for boobs (it’s not “milk jugs,” I’ll tell you that). Write free form, write as it comes to you, write upside if that’s what gets your mind rolling. If you want to spiff up your story, you can always edit later. The real nut of the erotica (if you’ll excuse my phrasing) is the sex/play/love scene. You get that down, and you can flesh it out as much or as little as you like, adding bells and whistles to tickle your fancy. Or maybe the bells and whistles are your fantasy, who knows! No one has to, and that’s why you smirk a little bit every time your cursor brushes past the unassuming smut labeled “grocery list 10.10.09.” Ring me up, indeed.
Image by roberthuffstutter.
The Sexual Manifesto is Christine Borden’s weekly column on sex in the city, sex and culture, and, well, sex. Got a tip for Christine (and it’s not in your pants)? Email her at christine@sfappeal.com.
