We Live In Public — The Roxie

This one time I set up webcams all over my house to record my entire life. Playing video games, eating take-out, calling my friends on the phone, blogging, taking naps. It was all there. It was really groundbreaking stuff. Won a lot of lesser-known, meaningful awards. Eventually though the fame just became too much to handle. People would flag me down on the street and say, “You’re a God!” I knew they were just starstruck and the words came out instinctively, but I didn’t even feel very bad for them. After a while, I just needed some time for myself. So I hired a guy to act like me in my place while I went clubbing in Fiji. I tweeted the trip. Anyway, I just wanted to say how happy I am that we live in a society where hard work, putting yourself out there, and doing what you’re passionate about is so appreciated. Later.

Director Ondi Timoner in person. Info.

A Serious Man — Embarcadero Center Cinema

It was originally titled “A Jewish Man” but Focus Features thought that made it sound like a comedy. (hah!)

The Coen Brothers movies are sometimes (much too) quickly put in either the heavy or light pile. The Hudsucker Proxy: light. Fargo: heavy. The Ladykillers: light. Blood Simple: heavy. Even the light ones usually deal with grand philosophical anxieties. Like Woody Allen as Hamlet. The problem with the “light” ones, to which A Serious Man looks closer, is that they sometimes feel condescending. And who’s the father of condescension? God. Just ask Job. Or watch and see for yourself. Info.

(Ironically, the only one of their movies that actually made me feel “lighter” was No Country For Old Men. Because I shit myself.)

Donnie Darko — The Clay (Midnight)

Nothing makes my house parties purr quite like a little Tears for Fears. And by “house parties” I mean my cat Sparkles because I don’t ever have parties. We know this by now right?

See it for Swayze. You’re on the love side of the line bro. Friday/Saturday. Midnight. Info.

Couples Retreat — Century Centre 9, AMC Van Ness

This movie promises to be the cinematic equivalent of a Brazilian Wax. (That’s the bad one, right? Brazilian?) Website.

The Goonies — Dolores Park

Wasn’t this playing somewhere like two weeks ago? How often do you guys really need to go on crazy Goonie adventures? Doesn’t it feel more like a Warriors weekend? Someone project Warriors in some other park and let’s have ourselves a good old fashioned San Francisco 80’s kids throwback movie projecting inter-park war. Thursday. Info.

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