This weekend at the Mondrian pool in LA, my husband and I settled our chubby white bodies into the otherwise empty patch of shade and looked around the pool to find that we were at what looked like an old age convention.

All the other pool goers had dark orange tans and crazy white denture-like teeth. But when I focused a little more it turned out these people were young. Their denture white teeth and crazy tans were by choice! I was a little disappointed because I was hoping to see George Hamilton but then I realized, what I was witnessing was the New Hollywood Look.

It actually makes complete sense. The best way to get something is to look like you don’t need it and who needs an acting job less than an old star on his or her deathbed? Genius.

On her way to finding answers to your questions, Babe sees and hears a lot. Loiterer tells some of these stories, but she’s just one loiterer in a city of thousands — send your overheards and pocket-sized anecdotes her way.

the author

Babe Scanlon is a writer living and working in San Francisco. She's worked as an archaeologist, computer game designer, agent at Agent Provocateur and hypnotherapist. She is controlling your mind at this very moment.

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  • spamspamspam

    Ok Babe, lets see how LA ready you are. How would you order your water at a fine LA restaurant?

  • Babe Scanlon

    Dear spamspamspam,

    A fine restaurant would never care how you ordered your water. If they do then the place is just a dump parading as a “fine restaurant”.

    The “fineness” of a restaurant is at least 50% dependent on the behavior of the staff. Don’t be fooled by those restaurants that pride themselves on being rude or snotty, they’re scamming you just as much as if they spit on your food, the only difference is that they’re spitting on your experience.

    Sorry it took so long for my reply my email has been wonky.

  • spamspamspam

    Oh Dear Babe it has nothing to do with the restaurant. It is a statement about the culture. The pretence people put on but don’t think about it.

    Besides I liked the movie LA Story.