Everyday that I walk through this city, I am thankful I don’t have a cuddling fetish. There are so many people sleeping on the sidewalks, and I know it must be awful, but they look so cozy. If I had a cuddling fetish I couldn’t help myself from getting down on the warm pavement and scooching my body until I was firmly spooning some poor homeless guy.

I have to wonder what would happen though. Would it be a positive experience, maybe the guy needs a hug? Might there be reciprocal cuddling where we take turns being the outside spoon? Or would it just be awful where I’d scare the hell out of him?

I guess the biggest obstacle would be the inevitable misinterpreted sexual come on. It would not be the least bit sexual on my part but you can’t really can you go up to a strange man, spoon him, and not have him think you’re coming on to him. Which is completely understandable.

So then I have to wonder, would it work better to try spooning a same sex street sleeper? Certainly a man surprise spooning a sleeping woman would be threatening, would a woman surprise spooning another woman be equally threatening? How about girl on guy?

These questions plague me especially because I know I’ll never get the answers myself. I just don’t have the drive it would take to give it a shot. But if you do, let me know so I can film it.

On her way to finding answers to your questions, Babe sees and hears a lot. Loiterer tells some of these stories, but she’s just one loiterer in a city of thousands — send your overheards and pocket-sized anecdotes her way.

the author

Babe Scanlon is a writer living and working in San Francisco. She's worked as an archaeologist, computer game designer, agent at Agent Provocateur and hypnotherapist. She is controlling your mind at this very moment.

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